Why hello there. Nothing untoward happening in here—I’m just recording my very first audiobook, Past, Present, Future. Want to see?
It’s not the most organized recording studio. Sorry about that. Don’t mind the sweaty workout clothes on the floor to your right—that’s what the scent thingy is for. Look to your left and you’ll see where the magic happens.
Turns out if you clear the clothes off your shelving and add a microphone to the mix, you can have yourself a decent little recording space. My wife built that shelving and my stepmom gave me that Blue Yeti microphone. Thanks to them both!
Odd though it may sound, it helps to have all these clothes around. With the door closed in a small space, the fabric dampens reverberations, similar to those fancy foam panels you see in pro studios. But do those fancy foam panels have cats on them like my t-shirts do? I think not.
Turn around. Try not to squeal. You’ll see a mound of Magic: The Gathering cards. Perhaps this is what you thought I meant when I said “this is where the magic happens.” It sort of is.
When I’m not recording or selecting an outfit for the day (I devote little time to the latter), I’ll ogle my cards. Note my meticulous sorting methods, e.g. the boxes labeled “Randos” and “More Randos.”
Behind my recording shelf and above my Magic cards, you’ll notice some posters on my wall. They are, clockwise, from the top…
A Magic card called “Goldmeadow”: It’s a special oversized edition that never really clicked with players, but the artwork is spectacular. Shoutout Warren Mahy.
The album cover to the 1981 Who album Face Dances: Not the best Who (since it’s missing Keith Moon), but it’s still The Who.
A caricature of my wife and me: Sara looks like herself, but I think I look more like my dad.
The promo poster for the Jiminy Glick Experience’s first public show: That’s the band I’m in with my friends. Shoutout to Tuna for a sweet design.
A map of Middle-Earth: It came from within my dad’s old edition of Fellowship. Proof that hobbits don’t use GPS.
Here’s a POV shot. I read my books from my favorite book creation software, Vellum. It’s a nice, clean layout for reading, especially that panel on the right, which shows exactly what your work looks like on the page.
And how does it sound? You’ll have to let me know, because Past, Present, Future. is available now on Audible. You can listen at that link, or…
For premium subscribers of this publication, I’m offering the audiobook for free in the hidden section below. You can even subscribe for a month and then cancel. You’ll only hurt my feelings a little bit.
Anyhoo, thanks for visiting my closet. Now if you wouldn’t mind stepping outside, my cats need the space for a while. For napping, of course.
Kyle A. Massa is a comedy author of some sort living somewhere in upstate New York with his wife, their daughter, and three wild animals. His published works include 10 books, along with several short stories, essays, and poems. When he’s not writing, he enjoys reading, running, and drinking cheap coffee.
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Your audiobook sounds great! Did you do it all in Garageband?